Monday, 9 January 2012

I have decided........


..............to move on.

As I've mentioned before I suffer with depression and have done for quite a while (thank you, menopause). Since the back end of 2011 I've really been struggling, I've also been fighting with a new back problem (I strat physio the week after next). I've worked over the weekend but today I took a sick day as I couldn't face another 12 hours fighting with my back at work, the bending, pushing and moving has got too much. As you can imagine it didn't go down well.

Over the weekend someone asked me if I will be in the same job until I retire. This question has made really think. Combined with the 12 hour days which I'm finding too much, the stress of being a manager, working for a new company and some other issues I'd better not air on a public blog in case it comes back to haunt me, I've decided enough, is enough............I am going to change my job. It has been coming on, probably 2 years but I didn't want to change the status quo. This might seem to some - so what, just get on with it but I've been in this job 12 years and I've seen many ups and downs, we've also built up a good reputation and kept it - which, in this industry is an achievement. The home is like a another family and I know I'll be missed and I'll miss them but for my long term mental and physical health I need to be pro active and change my life style. At present I feel very trapped and so unhappy. 

Ideally I want to lessen my hours and try to get back some life/work balance, I also want to work on improving my health and to do this I need to move on. Wish me luck! One thing seems apparent, there seems to be plenty of RN jobs about.

12 comments:

sunny said...

Oh I know what a hard decision that is to make. It may take some time, but I'm sure you'll find another job that gives you the same gratification, but gives you more 'you' time, to take care of your health. I understand the whole menopause, depression thing too, and it's not easy to deal with. Here's hoping for a very happy and healthy future for you!

Miss 376 said...

I wish you all the best in your search for a new job. Sometimes we have to make big changes to look after ourselves. It will be worth it in the end

Cardygirl said...

Big changes always are hard...but you have the opportunity to improve your health and get more enjoyment out of life...go for it!

Stray Stitches (Linda G) said...

I can't imagine the turmoil you have been through trying to make a decision as major as this. I hope all turns out well for you and that your life becomes a happy one once again.

Fiona said...

Good choice.... if you are not happy where you are move on ... all the best
Hugz

Sue said...

It's a difficult decision, but ow at the start of a new year, it may be the perfect time to retake control of your life. I wish you so much luck and look forward to hearing good reports. As a fellow depression sufferer, I know that keeping on top of it and not letting the depression get control is paramount We're all behind you.
Sue

Ann Marie @ 16 Muddy Feet said...

Kudos to you. You will be much happier. My husband had the same hard decision to make, I kept telling him to move on, that he was miserable where he was, that it couldn't be any worse where he was going to go, it could only be better, and if he didn't like it, he could always go back. Not even an entire week on the new job, and he said he should have done that two years ago when I first told him too. It was sooooo much better than the old job. Yes he still likes the old "job" better, but the atmosphere, and everything else is sooo much better at the new one, especially the people. He has had the opportunity to go back several times to the old job, but he says that place hasn't changed, he isn't going back.

Nicole said...

I have stayed in jobs way too long myself. I think if I had listened to my inner voice telling me it was time to move on I would have been far better off. Instead I stayed on and things ended very badly. You are so smart to take steps now to give yourself the sort of life you know you want and deserve. You won't regret it! Best of luck in your quest.

Robyn G. said...

Wishing you all the very best Ailsa.
Change is usually scary but sometimes it's time.
If your health is suffering that's not good especially when caring for others.
Do take care and I'll be thinking of you.
Great big hugs!!!
Robyn xx

Mrs Dibble said...

Having been in the pretty much the same position myself...I did make the decision to change my life radically and get out of a job that was driving me mad....and all is well now. Go for it....a happy life is more important than a job!!

Nicola said...

I'll send you an email to chat properly, but from someone who's been there done that, I'd say you'll feel so different once you've moved on - believe me, the hardest part is making the decision to change your job - from there on it's easy - I changed my job last year (still nursing) and haven't looked back - now I ENJOY going to work every day, and I work with a fab team. Take care, sending you many postive thoughts!!! Nicola xx

Pen Pen said...

Best wishes to you! I stumbled upon your blog and I can so totally relate to your situation. The beauty of nursing is that we can make changes whenever we feel the need. I hope you find what you are looking for!